Nobody’s Perfect:The story of Meghan Fox’s thumbs

Ok, Dale’s back…

So I was watching ‘Jennifer’s Body’ a couple of weeks ago with my girlfriend, which really isn’t that bad of a movie considering what you’d expect (Think closer to Scream than The Grudge), but obviously, the selling point of the movie is the fact that Megan Fox is the slutty main character. Sure, Diablo Cody wrote the movie, but 9 out of 10 people probably don’t know that. Anyway, so Meghan Fox. Maxim’s Hottest Girl in the World. The epitome of sexuality to millions upon millions of guys worldwide (me, not so much..). I’ve actual heard more than one person describe her as “perfect”. We’ll get back to that in a second.

Back to the movie. So it gets to the part where she makes out with her best friend, which is meant to be the hottest scene in the movie, and they start going at it, everything’s fine, then Meghan Fox puts her hand on the girl’s cheek. Confused, fascinated and thoroughly disgusted, I exclaimed “What the FUCK is wrong with her thumb?!?!?”. My girlfriend promptly confirmed my statement. Meghan Fox’s thumb is a Gollum thumb.

We looked online and found out that she suffers from a condition called “clubbed thumb” or “hammer thumb”. Basically stubby little gnome thumbs on an otherwise normal hand.

So I’ll apologize in advance to those of you reading this that think Meghan Fox is the hottest girl in the world. The reason I feel an apology is necessary is because I have just exacerbated the fact that NO ONE is perfect. Whether it be internal or external, everyone has a flaw. It’s a known fact that most hot girls are bitchy and most fat girls are really nice. Finding a happy medium is what makes the game so difficult. But one thing is for sure. The Dale could not imagine dating a girl like Meghan Fox knowing that every time you hold her hand, or she touches your face, or she touches you anywhere else for that matter, she will be touching you with those little gremlin thumbs. If you can handle that (see what i did there), then good for you, but Dale’s entirely too picky. Hands are the first point of contact, and I don’t want that contact to remind me of this…


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64 thoughts on “Nobody’s Perfect:The story of Meghan Fox’s thumbs

  1. What happened to the original post you Facist! DON’T SPREAD YOUR PROPAGANDA! JOHN MAYER BOY SHALL NOT BE SILENCED!!!!

  2. Hey.
    Megan Fox is hot.
    I don’t care what her hands look like.
    Anyone who says anything to the contrary is compensating for something.

    1. oh hey thanks cecilia for your valued input. for your information, the Dale doesnt think she’s hot, and is not compensating for anything. He is just simply used to dating a higher caliber of girls. It is blatantly obvious you are nowhere near this caliber, nor will you ever be. I mean…your name IS Cecilia.
      Thanks again for your useless input. Keep reading!

      1. couple things to say to “the Dale” you speak in third person….im pretty sure every single girl out there (straight,Biosexual,lesbian) wud take megan fox and her toe thumbs over a guy who speaks in third person and whos clearly a closet fag ne day.shouldnt be ashamed of who you are its ok you can come out of that closet any time

      2. hey, “Anonymous”,
        Thanks so much for your mindless input, and I promise, if the Dale ever DOES decide to come out of the closet, you will be first in line to gargle my balls. I promise. So don’t lose sleep over it. You now have it in writing. Dale’s word.

      1. Dont encourage cecilia. Shes not intelligent. Anyone with intelligence would realize that someone like me loves a good argument. So if she/you were intelligent, you wouldnt bother posting a comment against me. Stupid fat girls, you’ll never learn will you.

  3. You are ridiculous, Dale. Im only writing because im drunk and we were talking about megans thumbs and this site came up when we looked it up. She is beautiful until she got her surgery. who cares about her thumbs. Everyone is different. We are all not alike, thats what separates us from eachother. If all you guys can talk about is someone that is near perfects thumbs then ive got one thing to say…Get a life!!

      1. You imly that the superficial idolization of Meghan is shallow yet your equal and opposite disgust is equally so. Surely you see that.

  4. My name was Meghan Fox long before this midget thumbed-ho became famous! 25 years of having this name and now I am going by Meg, just to be disassociated from the likeness of her whorish persona. Yes, I am a pretty girl, you can look me up and see it for yourself, my man says that I resemble Marilyn Monroe, and I have met men (whether it be in public, my friends, or complete strangers) who confirm what my man says about me. I’ve even been told I look like A. Nicole Smith too. That being said, her thumbs are just plain gross. Anyone who says otherwise, is sticking up for a girl who (if you were ever to be given the slightest, most minute chance to even meet this person, let alone, any celeb…for that matter) probably wouldn’t give you the time of day. Possibly because she is so used to men coming up to her, bothering her, etc, that you probably wouldn’t be able to get past her security anyhow. Just saying. I, for one, think we all have our flaws, and we all have something we would like to change about ourselves, be it physical, emotional, inward, or outward, we all need to gain more confidence and be less picky about stupid stuff, like our outward appearance, when it is the inside that counts the most. Plus, confidence is smoking hot!!
    If I were her, I would get those thumbs worked on & have them surgically lengthened or something. What proves my point on this is: She even has had to resort to using hand-doubles in her movies, because she is so reluctant (obviously so) to show those creepy, little, circus-freak-show-esque, feet-hands of hers. And, that, my friend is just pathetic. Be real, or don’t act like you are. When we watch a movie, I would like to think the body parts I’m looking at belong to the person in question doing the scene, not the director cutting to someone else’s appendages, cause the actor/actress was too insecure about themselves to show it.
    So, why is that, anyway? I know it, you know it and they know it too: Actors in “Hollyweird” are among the most beautiful (bone structure and physique-wise) and have the straightest/near perfect teeth in the world. It’s so strange that the prettiest ppl in our country (and some, like myself are not famous and have to fight every day just to fit in & gain some sort of normalcy) live and work in Hollywood. All I’m saying is I would love one day to be able to not be gawked at when I leave the confines of my home by BOTH sexes (b/c he is looking & she is too, just to see if he is looking -which he IS) and to even get a job because ppl are so damn jealous, when I didn’t ask to be born so good looking that it actually separates me from being a normal person.
    I guess it just goes to show you that we are all human, whether we are trying to be perfect or not. Even ppl like Megan Fox have inferiority complexes about the physical. Get over it and be yourself! Duh!

    The REAL MegHan Fox =)
    P/S: “The Dale”, your witty banter was amusing and sarcastic humour was quite funny, actually. I find your posts worthy of my time and easy to read.

  5. Dale you asshole, accept people and stop being so damn superficial and shallow. You should be in a mental institution because of your stupid mentality.

    1. And you should be in school if you think being shallow is a mental disorder. Get off your computer and go learn. Moron.

  6. This makes me feel a tiny bit better about myself, considering I’m sure all the boyfriends I’ve ever had, including my current, would love to fuck her…scratch that–pretty much all males would love to fuck her. Even though my own pointer fingers and thumbs are a little messed up too…genetic. (Thanks, Dad.)

  7. I have clubbed thumbs. It’s the way God made me and I’m not ashamed of them. I don’t think you should put anyone else down about it either.

  8. Or, if you completely disregard her thumb (which i don’t really give a crap about btw) Maybeeee.. she only looks perfect cause shes had so much surgery and has a hair and make-up team working on her before every public appearance? not to mention, CAKES of make-up, a personal trainer to keep that body, and of course the famous photoshop. Just sayin’, worshiping her for her appearance is a waste of time, i’d rather be ugly than a beautiful fake.

  9. i gotta admit the so called toe thumbs are digusting, Dale, love the post. And would you people stop talking shit on him! everyone is entitled to their own opinion!!!! i honestly dont see what the big deal is about this chick anyway, shes a shitty actress #1, shes fake as hell #2, and their are so many other actress’s that are not getting the attention they need because of this chick #3. Now thats my opinion, if you like it respond. If you dont PISS OFF! thanks Dale for writing such a controversial post šŸ™‚ you rock!

    1. I have to comment on yhu! I love it! Haha evrything yhu said I agree(: fucking awesome post kiddo yhu should write more about her nd I’m sure yhu have great taste in women cause yhu dnt find her attractive! Hah! (x

    1. If you were clever, when you wrote this comment you would have written your name as “I” instead of “me”. Then it would have read as “I said” instead of “Me said”. Just an observation.

  10. My bff are perfect, she can get any boy she wants and are super popular but her thumb are just like that! fucked up.

  11. Not all “fat” girls are nice. Throughout the school years I was bullied by”fat” girls mostly. I have met quite a few that are always aggressive and talking about others in a mean way. Not all pretty girls are mean. I think it just relies in each person, their decision to be nice or be mean, the way they were brought up and what ideas they have on their head about themselves and others. Anyhoo.. I’m not being mean to you, just thought I’d share. šŸ™‚

  12. Dude wtf iz wrong with you? Its A THUMB! Its not the end of the world! Geez , you can be hot and have a funny thumb its fine!
    AND WTF bout’ “oh fat girls r nice , pretties r mean!”
    Dude , pretty girls can be nice and fat girls can be mean! It doesnt matter about the size and lookswhen it comes to personnality!
    Discrimination nowadays seriously! What if you meet her and find out she’s the sweetest chick ever?

    WHY do guys count on everysingle fucking detail? cant you count on personality for once in ur life?

    1. Just a thumb? Your hands are the first point of contact with another human being. Id say they’re pretty important. Just like a first impression. Are you going to argue with that logic?

  13. I don’t know much about Megan Fox’s life, so this isn’t me defending her as some big fan or anything. But people need to stop talking about her fingers. Way too many people have talked about this on the internet, and there is no reason to. Clubbed thumbs existed long before she came around, and they’re more common than people think. They work the way your’s do too. Why be so immature about it.

      1. I didn’t come here to make fun of someone’s thumbs. I posted a reply because I think this whole thing has become ridiculous. If you think that’s hypocritical, that’s cool for you. You have ‘normal / standard’ thumbs, so apparently that makes it okay for you to insult people who have different ones. Whatever. No one is going to make you change your mind, but maybe you can try to put yourself in other people’s shoes.

      2. No, you came here to read about someone else making fun of someone’s thumbs. Its called having a sense of humour. Its an absolutely beautiful girl with strange appendages. Ease the fuck up and quit preaching. Your whiny droning falls upon deaf ears here at the Dale. You’re just making yourself fodder for my enterainment.

      3. “Nobody’s perfect” is part of the title, so I came here because I thought it sounded like a more positive post. If what you wrote was just a joke, then I’m sorry for misunderstanding that part.

  14. I think it’s unfortunate that we take someone like Megan fox who has worked to get where she is (acting is a hard world, take it from someone who works there) and we desperately try to pick her apart to make ourselves feel better. I’m not perfect, but I don’t go making fun of someone who’s prettier than me to make mysel feel better. This society is way too based on looks and finding flaws in others. If you knew who Megan Fox really is, you would see she’s a hilarious girl. Please stop judging people guys, it’s not cool.

    1. are you implying megan fox is prettier than me? how dare you. and dont pretend that you know megan fox personally. “take it from someone who works there”. lol. you wish you were as important as you think you are.

  15. I love how everyone’s all like, “Stop being such an asshole and accept people!” but they’re the same superficial shitbags that think she’s perfect just ’cause she’s pretty. That’s cute.

  16. Why don’t you post a picture of yourself as I’m sure you are completely hideous. No one respects people with your mindset. Get a real job and be a productive person. I will choose an ugly thumb every day of the week over an ugly mind. At the end of the day it’s you that repulses people. I feel truly sorry for your girlfriend. Then again she either doesn’t exist or is a complete moron just like you.

    People like you will never get anywhere in life. Enjoy responding to these comments. At least it will give you something to do to distract you from realizing what a piece of shit you are.

    1. this is not a job. its something i do for fun to upset people like you. i dont post a picture of myself because the dale is a collective. but i can assure you, you’d love to have a boyfriend who looked like me. now, assuming i have an ugly mind is ignorant, and since you’re playing the ‘mightier than thou’ card, its not good to generalize. it makes you look petty. as does calling me a moron. read my work and you’ll see im far from it. and ‘people like me’ are already somewhere in life. in fact, much farther than you can aspire to be…ever. so go preach to your children or your parents or your husband or your husbands girlfriend. someone who gives a shit about you. because i dont. stupid twat.

      1. It’s so funny reading how people call you what you are and then if course you have to come back here and defend yourself because your severely insecure. You are a sad little man who needs constant validation so keep coming back with stupid comments to validate yourself loser.

  17. you know what “dale” your opinion is absolutely irrelevat so why dont you shut the fuck up and go fuck yourself?
    i hate megan fox,her personality annoys me but you know what you annoy me more
    you are probably some 40 year old virgin with a small penis who has fantisies about his mother

  18. Not too sure who this chick is, but her thumb did look pretty intense at some point. I don’t agree with the stereotype that all fat girls are nice and on the same notion that all pretty/”hot” girls are uptight or considered to be hostile. It’s more of an insecurity on behalf of those who are only incompetent with themselves and where they may be at this point in their life. She is a beautiful woman no questionable doubt but it’s all about the personality like some other dude had stated earlier in his comment. My name is Jay…. And I stumbled upon this because I wanted to see people who had decifiencies of some sort. You guys are all funny. The comment that stood out to me the most was “iā€™d rather be ugly than a beautiful fake.” I would like to just say as motivation for those who may have none, “Stronger in new way’s, Don’t care what they say. This is your life… and however… you should rejoice.” With that said… stop making fun of her thumb lolzzzz

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